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Bush Urinating on Company Time


Guest $iLk
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bathroom3pu.jpg A new scandal is rocking the White House, one sure to leave a bright yellow stain on the peeResidency for years to come - and this time the digital brownshirts won't be able to spin it under the rug like they did with the Texas National Guard memos. According to newly released photographic evidence, Bush attempted to interrupt a UN Security Council meeting with a taxpayer-funded bathroom break.

It's bad enough that the Shrub vacations for 9 months out of the year, but does he have to urinate on my dime as well? Do the math, folks. Bush's salary is $400,000 a year, or 76 cents a minute. Let's say he takes six pee breaks a day at three minutes each - five minutes if he pees sitting down like Oliver Willis. Perhaps we should ask ourselves if we can really afford to continue the war in Iraq, AND pay Bush over $7,000 a year to use the loo.

Say what you will about Bill Clinton, but he never allowed his natural urges to interfere with his job. Al Gore hasn't had a bowel movement in over 17 years. Yet Bush apparently thinks he can piss away our hard earned money whenever nature calls.

Well, I say enough is enough. 3,000 American died because the Shrub was too busy reading about a pet goat to do his job. Another 10,000 have gone missing in New Orleans, most likely because Bush was taking a "bathroom break" when Mayor Nagin called begging for help. I stand with Senator Biden's call for an immediate congressional investigation into the Tinklegate scandal. Bush must be held accountable for his bodily functions, before any more innocent lives are lost.

- Liberal Larry(BlameBush!)

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quote:

Originally posted by $iLk:

Al Gore hasn't had a bowel movement in over 17 years.

Hahahhahaha. So True.

While my stance on Bush really hasn't changed over the past 8 years, I didn't like him when he got voted in and I don't like him now, if the man has to go he's gotta go.

While I feel Iraq and New Orleans have been handled poorly, is the far left soooo desperate at this point that they're critquing the guy on taking a bloody bathroom break?

On a less serious tone... it is pretty damn funny.

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New Orleans was a LOCAL and STATE concern, NOT a Federal one.

And the Fed's were in there before they were in Florida during Andrew.

Federal response was incredible, local and state authorites SCREWED the pooch on this one.

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$ilk, I can't believe you are posting this BS here.

I was disgusted with Bush's speech when he was saying "We will rebuild New Orleans, we are making it easier to obtain government help as we speak". I was thinking, you bastard, was New Orleans build with taxes in the first place? If a piece of the freeway, or highway was damaged, or a government building like a post office, that were build with taxes in the first place, you rebuild that with taxes, whatever wasn't build with taxes, you let the citizens and bussinesses handle that. You don't spend my taxes on hand outs, on private government contractors and all this BS. You let them re-build themselfs. Let the capitalistic system do it's job, oh, I forgot, this whole government has gutted our system, we are socialists now, nevermind.

Anyhow, you blaming Bush for 3,000 Americans dead. Would that be the 9/11? Would that be right after Clintons administration? Would that be when Clintons lawyers said that it was illegal to hand over highjackers names to the FBI for investigation? Would that be FBI trying to investigate BEFORE those hijackers commited those acts? So wouldn't Clintons policies be to blame? Therefore CLINTON.

You blaming Bush for New Orleans. You blaming him for the levies and poor evacuation? How about the government that was diverting money FROM the levies to their gambling infrastructure. How about the government that REFUSED to declare an emergency after Bush told them to. How about the goverment that didn't utilize those BUSES that they were SUPPOSED to.

White house shouldn't have been involved in that dissaster at all. Period. Does the 81st airborne come to Florida everytime there's a hurricane? Do we see billions in federal aid heading to Florida after a hurricane? Now, Bush has even said that he is looking into an army playing a bigger role in domestic operations. I almost threw the TV out the window when he said that. That would be a blatant violation of our constitution. Nobody cares however, and these sheeple have stoped carring a long time ago. So as much as I hated what Bush was saying for the last 2 weeks. Still, stop spreading lies, because the only thing you will get out of it, is more disasters like New Orleans, but you will get them in San Francisco, Richmond, and Oakland, CA after an earthquake. Those cities mayors, CA liberal politicians and people living in those cities are just as inept and used to wellfare as the ones in New Orleans. So stop spreading lies, and start finding more problem spots (like I have listed above), and take a look at what government is governing those problem spots. Maybe then it will become clearer to you what breeds dependence, inaptitude, and INCOMPETENCE.

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Relax guys,it's a humor piece.

However, Bush IS the President, the leader of our country and like it or not, leaders always get blamed when things go wrong even if they had no direct hand in the problem.

It's in corporate culture and politics. Society has leaders not just to provide guidance and direction, but to take the fall when the feces hits the fan.

Do you all forget how eager everyone was to blame Clinton for everything? Even how they STILL do it? It goes with the job, deal with it.

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quote:

Originally posted by $iLk:

[QB]

Say what you will about Bill Clinton, but he never allowed his natural urges to interfere with his job.

No, from what I understand he went right on working as he satisfied his "urges".

Eh, Humor. Right?

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quote:

Originally posted by JUDGExKTF:

ROFL, great piece.

But shouldn't this have been posted in the "Laughter" section?

I figure we could use a laugh.

***THIS JUST IN***

New Bush Hurricane Targeting Gay Community

In the terrible aftermath of Hurricane KKKatrina, the nation watched with renewed horror - if not a certain sense of schadenfreude - as Hurricane Ophelia bore down on the white republican stronghold of Florida. Then she suddenly veered away, no doubt after a late night phone call from Brother Jeb to Brother Shrub, and made a beeline for North Carolina and its 1.5 million Blacks. Now, Bush's latest hurricane is targeting the Florida Keys, specifically Key West, admired for its vibrant gay community and vociferous opposition to George Bush.

Bush's infamous intolerance for diversity is about to claim its next round of victims. Even as New Orleans slowly recovers, Bush's "cleansing" of the Keys has already begun. The doors and windows on hundreds of gay discos have been boarded up. Thousands of frightened citizens have already pranced to higher ground, with thousands more certain to flounce, flit, or sashay away in the coming hours. Once the storm has passed and the giant cloud of purple feathers and dimpled chads has settled, Bush will be free to build his own Gulag Archipelago - a string of miniature Guantanamos where Muslim same-sex couples and flamboyantly gay freedom fighters will be held without due process.

Halliburton is probably drawing up the blueprints as I type.

- Liberal Larry (BlameBush!)

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