Guest Posted March 15, 2001 Report Posted March 15, 2001 In perspective:The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the"k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen ve vil tak over ze world!
Blades Posted March 15, 2001 Report Posted March 15, 2001 Dear god, reading that made my scrotum tighten. Still, as absurd as it sounds, I wouldnt put it past those euro muppets in Brussels to *konsider* it. ------------------ Fleet Cmdr. Karl Savage GCV - Tsunami, Orion Starstation (CENTRIS) Fleet Leader, ORION FLEET www.orionfleet.com'Here cometh the storm!'[This message has been edited by Blades (edited 03-15-2001).]
Guest Posted March 15, 2001 Report Posted March 15, 2001 Exactly right, absurd as it may sound, leave it to some bureaucrat to come up with such a thing. It could happen, and I think that is what makes it so funny.Good one!! ------------------ CMDR Jaguar GCV Armageddon, Starpath (Mars) Prime Fleet, Delta Wing ICQ# 24007233 External Beta Tester Battlecruiser Millenium
Guest Posted March 15, 2001 Report Posted March 15, 2001 I think that one's being going around since mid-1999, it's still very funny though. If that happened for real, i could probably sum it up with one word:Scheiße (that's Sh!t if you didn't know) ------------------ Commander Robert Martin GCV-Dark Knight, GALCOM HQ (EARTH) S26 Wing Leader, Prime Fleet Beta Wing
Eclipse Posted March 15, 2001 Report Posted March 15, 2001 LOL!!------------------ Commodore Kyle Antilles ICV-Eclipse, Destiny Starstation (Nevuela) Commanding Officer, Destiny Spectre Fleet External Beta Tester Battlecruiser Millennium"You can only love or hate something you truly understand"
GREG MILLER Posted March 16, 2001 Report Posted March 16, 2001 ROTFLMAO!!!So I gues zis means zat by ze fifz year, will all be iliterat??? ------------------ Commander Greg Miller GCV - Sark, Orion Starstation (CENTRIS) Fleet XO, Wing Leader, Tsunami Battle Group www.orionfleet.com'Here cometh the storm!'External Beta Tester Battlecruiser Millenium
Guest Posted March 16, 2001 Report Posted March 16, 2001 mebe ju unated stetz pipl wil jav tu lern EURO-Nics Found this in ACES HIGH forum, thought it was hilarious and brought it here.
Orravan Posted March 16, 2001 Report Posted March 16, 2001 Definite classic! Still makes me laugh whenever I read it as hard as the first time!
Hasenau Posted March 16, 2001 Report Posted March 16, 2001 quote:If that happened for real, i could probably sum it up with one word:ScheißeHehe... nice to see that German culture has prevailed throughout the ages
Epsilon 5 Posted March 17, 2001 Report Posted March 17, 2001 ROTFL!(Rol over ze flor)Talkin zis vay makz lik I vas talkin cul!Yea!Frankly zis iz ridiculus. No teacher vil ever want to change their scool program.If vu can't chuz between english and german, zen mix ze tu of zem.*evil lauf*------------------ Commander Epsilon 5 GCV - StalkerIV, Orion Starstation (CENTRIS) Deterrence Battle Group www.orionfleet.com 'This Far, No Farther!'
Guest Posted March 17, 2001 Report Posted March 17, 2001 quote:Originally posted by Epsilon 5: ROTFL!(Rol over ze flor)Talkin zis vay makz lik I vas talkin cul!Yea!Frankly zis iz ridiculus. No teacher vil ever want to change their scool program.If vu can't chuz between english and german, zen mix ze tu of zem.*evil lauf* nau, ju nid tu spel zings korektly epsilon! al singl "c" in englich ar replazed wit "k"."cul" iz "kul"! euroniks muzt b foloud korektly! bad student!ges wi nid tu weit for ze SC tu releze a korekt nd proper euro-englich verzion of batlkruizer!kil resnig!
Epsilon 5 Posted March 17, 2001 Report Posted March 17, 2001 Yay. When this come out (euro-english whatsoever...), I'll be writing in 3 languages...Le français est une belle langue...but english is easier...and euro-english iz funier. I must kontinue to practise so I may be beter vit time.Iz it serious?------------------ Commander Epsilon 5 GCV - StalkerIV, Orion Starstation (CENTRIS) Deterrence Battle Group www.orionfleet.com 'This Far, No Farther!'
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