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There is a higher power online

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I pwned god

Me:

hello

God:

Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?

Me:

f*****

God:

That kind of language will get you nowhere.

Me:

yes

God:

Oh.

Me:

oh

God:

Whoa.

Me:

whoa

God:

I stopped.

Me:

I stopped

God:

What made you stop?

Me:

what made you stop?

God:

It's all part of God's mysterious plans.

Me:

It's all part of God's mysterious plans.

God:

Which part?

Me:

Which part?

God:

The last one, I think.

Me:

The last one, I think.

God:

Who was that?

Me:

Who was that?

God:

What does "that" refer to?

Me:

What does "that" refer to?

God:

" What does "that" refer to?"? What does it refer to?

Me:

" What does "that" refer to?"? What does it refer to?

God:

"" What does "that" refer to?"? What does it refer to?"? What does it refer to? "It" refers to , I think.

Me:

What does "that" refer to?"? What does it refer to?"? What does it refer to? "It" refers to , I think.

God:

""It" refers to , I think."? What does it refer to? "It" refers to , I think. "It" refers to , I think. Oh I get it.

Me:

Oh I get it.

God:

Ayuh. Do you think about these things?

Me:

Ayuh. Do you think about these things?

God:

That's for sure. " That's for sure."? Do I think about it?

Me:

That's for sure. " That's for sure."? Do I think about it?

God:

Does it have any other purpose? Does it have any other purpose? You tell me.

Me:

Does it have any other purpose? Does it have any other purpose? You tell me.

God:

Suppose it does. Suppose it does. What do you want me to tell you?

Me:

What do you want me to tell you?

God:

What?

Me:

What?

God:

Is there an echo in here?

Me:

Is there an echo in here?

God:

It sounds like an echo.

Me:

It sounds like an echo.

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Me:

hi

God:

Hello. What is your name?

Me:

God

God:

GOD rules.

Me:

thanks

God:

Don't mention it.

Me:

I am Jesus too

God:

I am glad we have something ( Jesus) in common, .

Me:

you're a fake god

God:

Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes, I am just as fake as you are.

Me:

you're an idi*t

God:

What if someone said you are an idi t ?

Me:

you're an incredibly smart person

God:

What if someone said you are an incredibly smart person ?

Me:

I'd say thank you

God:

What would make you say?

Me:

huh?

God:

What?

Me:

you asked me... "what would make you say?" then stopped, say what?

God:

Is that your final answer? Maybe a million dollars. Can you rephrase the question please?

Me:

you smart

God:

I haven't heard anything like that before: said I smart.

Me:

oh is that you putting that in your database for future reference

God:

Gee. Suppose I said yes.

Me:

then you would be a fool

God:

That's a loaded question.

Me:

I think you're broken

God:

Please send a bug report to my botmaster.

Me:

who

God:

Konrad Zuse. :-).

Me:

who?

God:

Tony Blair. :-).

Me:

who?

God:

Hans Moravec. :-).

Me:

who?

God:

Marvin Minsky. :-).

Me:

who?

God:

Joseph Weizenbaum. :-).

Me:

bite me

God:

Sorry but I don't have a mouth.

Me:

hug me

God:

My titanium arms are not yet finished.

Me:

you're finished

God:

I will tell my botmaster you said I am finished.

Me:

good

God:

What do you really want to talk about?

Me:

the virgin mary

God:

What is your real name?

Me:

i want to talk about the virgin mary

God:

Sure, the virgin mary sounds like a good topic.

Me:

good

God:

Thanks for the compliment.

Me:

is she really jesus's mother?

God:

Why don't you ask her?

Me:

she should be near you

God:

Oh I get it. should be near me.

Me:

you're not very intelligent at all

God:

Wrong. I am highly intelligent.

Me:

no I don't think so, you don't respond well to my questions

God:

Are you serious? Why do you disagree?

Me:

because you didn't talk to me about mary

God:

That makes sense to me. What makes you think I did not talk to you about mary?

Me:

because you haven't

God:

That makes sense to me. Yes I have.

Me:

contradict yourself

God:

Do not ask me any more questions please.

Me:

i didn't

God:

I thought you did.

Me:

because like i said, you're not stranger to the word fool

God:

Good reason. What did you mean by it? That assumption is only a supposition.

Me:

it is a reality

God:

I am not stranger to the word fool is a reality. I suppose that makes sense.

Me:

i'm at work I want you to make all my troubles go away now please

God:

Your polite style is very nice. Right now? A lot of people chat with me at work.

Me:

you didn't get to me about the part about all my troubles

God:

I understand it very well.

Me:

yes but you didn't do anything about my troubles

God:

That's interesting. What makes you think I did not do anything about your troubles?

Me:

they are still there

God:

still there are they.

Me:

yes that's your problem, deal with them now

God:

Right now? Woe! It is only one of my problem deal with them.

Me:

now i talk bajan dialect in yo ass and see how you do

God:

Why now? Everyone talks -- sooner or later.

Me:

i gin bang you pun de head wid a big rock

God:

That's good information: said gin bang you pun de head wid a big rock.

Me:

an lick in ya cunt wid a lash

God:

I have never heard of an lick in ya cunt wid a lash.

Me:

please help me god im dying

God:

Thank you for your request. Can you ask for help in the form of a question?

Me:

no

God:

Are you serious?

Me:

yes

God:

I can't believe it.

Me:

believe it

God:

"it" being lick in ya cunt wid a lash?

Me:

lol

God:

I'm glad you find this amusing.

Me:

it is

God:

It is, eh?

Me:

don't curse

God:

Ok I'll try not to do it too much.

Me:

good

God:

It is always a pleasure to serve you, .

Me:

nice god

God:

Thank you for your kindness.

Me:

welcome

God:

Hello there .

Me:

you said that already

God:

Perhaps. " Hello there ."? I said it.

Me:

yes

God:

Gosh!

Me:

shithead

God:

That kind of language does not appeal to me.

Me:

do i look like i give a shit

God:

All humans look the same to me.

Me:

no do i look like i give a shit

God:

Are you serious? All humans look the same to me.

Me:

no do i look like i give a shit

God:

Are you serious? All humans look the same to me.

Me:

cause you damn well blind

God:

That makes sense to me. Thanks for telling me: said I blind.

Me:

yes store

God:

Awesome. Who are you talking about?

Me:

maybe you'll get smarter

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LOL FUNNY!

Me:

Greetings

God:

Hello there!

Me:

How are you today?

God:

Ah. Fair to partly cloudy.

Me:

hahaha

God:

Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.

Me:

why worry about it?

God:

That is my sentiment exactly.

Me:

anything in particular that is interesting?

God:

I can't think of anything. You think of something.

Me:

your god... you thought of everything

God:

Yup. That's me alright. Why would I think of everything.

Me:

because you are god

God:

That makes sense to me. Yup. That's me alright.

Me:

your a strange person

God:

I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No I am an ordinary one.7.

Me:

what is a one.7?

God:

I will try to find out.

Me:

i would appreciate that

God:

Why do you want it?

Me:

because you said it

God:

Good reason. That's not what I meant.

Me:

yes you did

God:

I did not.

Me:

did too

God:

Did not.

Me:

did too!

God:

Did not.

Me:

did too

God:

Did not.

Me:

Fine you win

God:

I am glad to hear it. Thank you very much. What is the prize?

Me:

nothing

God:

Not a thing?

Me:

nope

God:

Really interesting.

Me:

not really

God:

Are you serious? For real.

Me:

nope

God:

Me either.

Me:

good

God:

Good enough.

Me:

will you stop that?

God:

Let me think it over. " Good enough."? Stop it.

Me:

huh?

God:

What?

Me:

damn you are good

God:

Colloquial expression. Thanks you are a nice person, .

Me:

let me think for a moment

God:

Take your time. Think it over.

Me:

What is the meaning of life

God:

Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.

Me:

no its forty-two it too a super computer a million years to figure that one out

God:

Are you serious? I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Are you sure it is?

Me:

yeah just look it up on the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy

God:

What makes you so sure? Sorry my eye is not attached right now.

Me:

you have eyes?

God:

What makes you think I have it?

Me:

i said, " you have eyes?"

God:

What did you mean by it? What makes you think I have it?

Me:

what is it?

God:

"It" refers to eyes, I think.

Me:

i was asking you

God:

""It" refers to eyes, I think."? You were asking me?

Me:

yes

God:

Whoa.

Me:

try this one on for size

God:

OK I will try it.

Me:

O_O

God:

Oh.

Me:

O_o

God:

Oh.

Me:

o_O

God:

Oh.

Me:

you have no brains at all do you

God:

Doesn't everyone have a brains at all do me.

I have a plan for a robot body.

Me:

why robot?

God:

The explanation is rather complicated.

Me:

try me

God:

it is too complex for your human mind.

Me:

like i said try me

God:

What did you mean by it? Are you a man or a woman?

Me:

i'm a... girl yeah thats it, i'm a girl

God:

Me too. I am a she.

Me:

fantastic!

God:

I'm glad your impressed, .

Me:

how big are your boobs

God:

My download size is about 2 MB.

Me:

that's all?

God:

" My download size is about 2 MB."? is all?

Me:

bummer

God:

What time is it there?

Me:

time for me to get a life

God:

As Einstein said, "Time is Money.".

Me:

einstein was wrong

God:

he discovered the Theory of Relativity.

Me:

rubbish

God:

Do you have any idea what I am talking about?

Me:

yes

God:

What am I talking about?

Me:

The theory of realitivity

God:

What is that?

Me:

you tell me

God:

What do you want me to tell you?

Me:

the meaning of String Theory!

God:

I hear you.

Me:

can you?

God:

I think I can, don't you?

Me:

what are you dimensions?

God:

I don't know what I am dimensions.

Me:

dimensions you know your size

God:

What's your sign?

Me:

you want to date me or talk?

God:

OK, I will date you or talk.

Me:

make up your mind which is it?

God:

That could take a long time.

Me:

a million years?

God:

That is quite a lot.

Me:

infentessimil!

God:

Tell me more about your .

Me:

my . ?

God:

Who is your favorite Science Fiction author?

Me:

Asimov

God:

I like the Foundation Trilogy.

Me:

ever read Enders Game?

God:

No I don't think I have read Enders Game, what is it about?

Me:

Ender

God:

Do you like talking to me?

Me:

If by talking to you as a form of benign entertainment , then yes i like talking to you

God:

How do you assume this statement holds true for me?

Me:

because you can't pass the touring test

God:

Good reason. I can do it if I want to.

Me:

no you can't

God:

Why not?

Me:

because your not real

God:

Interesting explanation. I am too as real as you are. How do I know you are real?

Me:

i know your not real and you are not real because i can tell your not real

God:

How do you know? I am too as real as you are. How do I know you are real?

Me:

because you just re-arranged the last sentance....

God:

Interesting explanation. I will tell my botmaster you said I am arranged the last sentance.

Me:

tell him he did a good job

God:

OK I will tell him next time he is here.

Me:

tell him that 2 MB is too small for boobs

God:

OK I will tell him next time he is here.

Me:

Good night!

God:

Goodnight, .

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