Hello my name is DeOsprey; I am a Battle Crack addict. I have been clean for 16 months, 2 weeks and 4 days, or at least I was until last week.
First a bit of history, I picked up my first box of bc3k years ago. I was looking for something different and boy did I find it. Sure, at first it was all fun and games. I kept telling myself ÔÇ£I can quit anytime I want.ÔÇØ But I didnÔÇÖt quit and on top of that I kept wanting more.
Months passed with me jonesing for a bigger thrill, a bigger rush. Then it happened, a little something with the street name Millennium hit town. It was exactly what I had been craving and I threw myself into it with reckless abandon. This was the big time, the hard stuff, the primo. It got to the point I was using as soon as my feet hit the floor in the morning until I passed out at night.
Caught in this downward spiral, thinking I had finally hit rock bottom, someone introduced me to Millennium Gold. Who is this evil battle lord SC anyway and will he never stop?
More time passed although my mind is clouded and I donÔÇÖt remember much about this period. My friends finally intervened and got me into a program called Jump gate, (my methadone). They slowly weaned me away from the battle crack. It wasnÔÇÖt easy but I was making real progress.
Then, last week I am walking through my local software retailer (without my battle crack anonymous sponsor, which is a big no no, I might add).When out of nowhere IÔÇÖm drawn to this small shiny box on the store shelf. I pick it up, hmmm, this seams so familiar. Universal CombatÔÇª catchy titleÔÇª nice artworkÔÇª the price is right. Besides it doesnÔÇÖt have the word battle in it, it says combat and there are no four digit numbers in the title, should be safe.
I rush home and install what I expect to be some mild, white bread title. Manual, I donÔÇÖt need no stinking manual, after all how hard can it be. I eagerly click the icon on my desk top and the dream catcher splash explodes onto my screen. (Dream Catcher how ironic). Twenty seven ours later I come to. My face lying on my slobber soaked keyboard, my hand still twitching on the rudder control of my sidewinder. Peering through my bloodshot eyes, num pad key imprints still readable in the side of my face, I turn to see my wife glaring, arms folded, with that ÔÇ£fell off the wagon didnÔÇÖt you lookÔÇØ.
What an evil trick Mr. Derek Smart (if thatÔÇÖs even your real name). Put any spin on the name change you want, I know the truth. Sucking pathetic addicts like myself back in. Evil Genius, I say.
Well IÔÇÖm not sure Jump gate is going to be enough to get me through this one. I only thank God SC is not working on a MMO or I would surely be doomed.
Fan boy or battle crack (sorry SC I mean Universal Crack) addictÔÇªyou decide.